Today Chris and I thought we would take James to the Pumpkin Patch - but Chris is a little leery about taking me anywhere... he's afraid we are going to have to race back home cause Graham wants to come out... so we opted out of the Pumpkin Patch which was ok with me as I've been having a lot of pelvic pressure today...and instead we took Jimbo to his Roaming Rascals.
We all got ready and were getting our shoes on - I asked James if it was ok if I came with him and Daddy "NO MUMMY! Jimmy and DADDY!" he yelled. He usually does this on Saturday's as Chris is the one to take him so I can have a little break and they get to spend some time together. So this was nothing new.
"Oh, Ok. I'll stay home" I said and then Chris spoke "No, James. Mummy is going to come too! We can all go"
"NO! NO! MUMMY GO AWAY! I HATE MUMMY"
I froze at the top of the stairs. My heart sank and I felt numb. Never EVER has James said anything like that. I know I may of overrated, or that my hormones got the best of me, but to even hear your son say those words, hurt so so much.
I said calmly. "Ok, Mummy will stay." and I proceeded to put my bag down, take my shoes off and then I started to cry. Chris was just as shocked as I was. He spoke to James with a stern voice and explained that you do not say that. Especially to Mummy.
Now I do not know where James learned to put those words together. Chris and I don't say we hate each other EVER!! (I mean we really don't) and I know that maybe he doesn't understand it, but for him to put those words into a sentence and USE it - WOW!
After Chris spoke to James, he came upstairs, and saw that I was upset. Chris asked James to apologise and he did "Sorry Mummy. I wuv you"
He gave me a big hug and a kiss and I told him that I loved him too.
Not wanting to punish him for something that he possibly didn't understand we all headed off to Roaming Rascals. He played with the other children, and then we came home for some lunch and our nap.
It's funny how once you become a parent, little words like that cut you very deep. I cannot tell you how terrible I now feel for all the times I told my mother I hated her.