I have - and yesterday I got to tell her just how thankful I was.
Like I said yesterday - my friend Amber and I went to a local baby fair. There were a lot of awesome vendors there! I even won a pair of WarmMuffs for the stroller! (Be sure to keep your eyes peeled for a review!)
Anyways, we came up to a table called Flow Baby. It was geared towards Breastfeeding mothers... OH I should mention that I successfully nursed Graham in the Ergo yesterday, as well as nursed in public WITHOUT a cover! I honestly gave myself a pat on the back. I wasn't nervous or anything... it was freeing!
Ok back to my story. I was checking out Flow Baby - they had some awesome Baby/Body butter, lactation cookies, as well as tea featured, but that's not what Flow Baby is ALL about. Flow Baby is a run by a RN - who supports women while breastfeeding. Check out her page and if you are local to me - are pregnant or needs help with breastfeeding check out Flow Baby.
While I was chatting with one of the ladies - I kept thinking to myself "My goodness. She looks really familiar - but I just can't place her" We chatted about their lactation tea - as you all know I am trying to up my already large supply so I can have a freezer stash. She handed me a pamphlet and I read her name. "Nikki Paxton - RN"
I knew she had to be local - so I asked casually which hospital she worked out of "Oh, Peace Arch"
BAM! it hit me!! I instantly got Goosebumps and started to choke back tears.
It took me a second to get my composure. I looked at her and said "Three years ago - I gave birth to my first born son at Peace Arch. My nurse's name was Nikki...." She looked at me and told me it was her.
CUE THE WATER WORKS
"Well, I just wanted to say thank you so very much for everything you did for me that day" - By this time I was crying. "If it wasn't for you, I don't think my birth would have gone the way it did. You made it something, - everything that I wanted it to be".
I honestly don't know what came over me. I never got to thank her for all her help and encouragement. I really do think if it wasn't for her, James' birth could have and most likely would have gone a completely different route.
She gave me a big hug, and I explained to her that I never got the chance to thank her. It was something I always wanted to do, but never got the chance.
We chatted a bit more, I bought my tea and off I went.
You see, after James was born - I was put into a small room with other new moms - Nikki only stayed for maybe 30 minutes and then was off helping the next soon to be mother. That was it. While I'm sure, I thanked her a hundred times - it was a thanking that was sincere - but not not right from the heart. Now I know that sounds terrible - but at that time - I was so entranced with my new little bundle that I could of been thanking the janitor for whatever!
To some, this story is just that - a story. A rambling of words - soon to be forgotten. But to me it's so so so much more than that.
At that time - I was a twenty two year old - soon to be mother. Who was scared shitless of what childbirth was going to be like. Nikki was there for one of the most intimate moments of my life. The day my entire life changed.
She most likely doesn't remember me - or the day James was born. But I do. And I will always be thankful for her and everything she did, not only for me - but for James as well.