I am supposed to have a home visit from the Midwives this week but they have been busy with other births which I totally understand but I still feel like I am very unprepared for Graham's birth. Having them come here I think would just put my mind at ease - I don't know why... maybe it's so they know how to get here, and maybe it will make it more real to me. I don't know - but if they don't get here this week I see them next Thursday. Got to love weekly appointments.**At this point in time with James I had my 36 week appointment - scheduled my 37 but never made it!**
I have a hospital bag packed for Graham (I am working on one for myself and will be posting what we have packed for him) but I think once I reach 37 weeks I won't be so paranoid that this child is going to fall out of me before I am term.
I've had some mild cramping at night, and in the morning, but it goes away during the day. I think I just don't realize it is happening. I mean I am running around chasing after James - the Braxton Hicks contractions have increased and and slightly intensified, but again, I'm guessing that is Graham getting ready.. as well as my uterus telling me it's almost go time!
Something else telling me its almost go time, is my little Jimmy. The child is stuck to me like glue. The last few days he has got up at 4:00 am only to call out for me and then he comes and cuddles in bed with me till about 8:00 am. Now usually he sleeps on "his side" or "my side" as he calls it - in reality it's Chris' side of the bed but try telling that to James. But for the last week he cuddles right up to me - RIGHT up to me. Arm around my neck, always needing to be touching me. I AM NOT COMPLAINING about that. I love his cuddles. Even his stinky morning breath hehe - I almost feel guilty that Graham is coming soon.
During the day he is shadowing my every move - I can't even go to the bathroom without him following me in. Again I'm not complaining - just telling it like it is. I'm scared to leave him with anyone - even with Chris as he freaks out when I leave him. I have a baby shower to attend on Saturday and I'm seriously worried that he will have a breakdown with Daddy.
I've made sure that I spend special time with him - for example when it's bed time Chris gives him his bath like normal and brushes his teeth and then Chris will put him in bed but I spend an extra 10 minutes with him giving him kisses and telling him how special he is and how much I love him "I, I yuv you too Mummy" Melts my heart every time. I don't want him to hate me after Graham is born. It's honestly my biggest fear.
**Funny moment this week** James and I were sitting on the couch and he went to lay down - head on my belly and Graham kicked him. He looked up at me and said "Mummy! Dam kicked me!" I couldn't help but laugh and then he started to laugh and said "No Dam Go to sleep!" Kids really do say the darnedest things.
So at 36 weeks - sleep is what I need! It's still hard to get to sleep and very easy for me to get up - well not in the physical sense. Getting out of bed it hard work and the whole needing to pee every 10 minutes is getting old. I guess it doesn't help that I drink 10 glasses a of water before bed! BUT if I don't I get terrible leg cramps! So I would much rather pee all night then wake up to spasms in my legs.
Ok - I have to go back and re read what I just wrote....hold on....Ok I think that sounds...uhh ok.
Now it's just a waiting game. Everyone is telling me I'll go early, and while I want to believe that, I have a funny feeling I'll go past my guess date. Which isn't a bad thing, I'm just very anxious to meet this little man.
I think I have rambled on long enough - Here's my 36 week belly shots. Getting low and uncomfortable!
36 weeks! Excuse the dead look - no make up for this mama today! |
Won't lie - very happy not to see any stretch marks - but my belly button has popped and looks funky! |
Hurry up Baby 'Dam' - we all want to meet you!
Much love
xoxo
I love this update! I've been enjoying extra snuggles, but I've moved past the guilt part and I'm REALLY excited to make Braden a big brother! But having said that, I know I'll have moments of guilt especially when I'm at the hospital and nursing like 24/7!
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